Marriage: Ephesians 5:22-24 "Submission" or "Co-operation" or "Partnership"

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The ancient Greek word for submission is hupotassō (verb) or hupotagē (noun). It is a military term derived from hupo ("under") and tasso ("to arrange" or "to rank"), literally meaning to arrange under or to subordinate.

In its original context, it described troops arranging themselves in formation under a commander, implying a hierarchy of accountability and order rather than loss of worth or coerced servitude. In the New Testament, it is used to describe:
  • Voluntary yielding: Believers submitting to one another out of humility and respect for Christ (Ephesians 5:21).
  • Ordered relationships: Maintaining dignity and structure in households and churches (1 Timothy 3:4, 1 Peter 2:13).
  • Alignment with truth: Submitting to gospel priorities and resisting error to preserve doctrinal integrity (Galatians 2:5).
While often translated as "submit" or "subject," modern scholarship notes that it can also carry nuances of cooperation, partnership, and mutual support within a shared purpose, rather than mere passive obedience.

Marriage was created in God's infinite goodness to be a portrait of the gospel to a lost and dying world. This truth should shape how we view and treat marriage. If marriage was created for God's glory, we should seek to steward the gift of marriage in a way that brings him glory. So, on the days that the butterflies fly away, our call to faithfully love our spouse will remain anchored because God is glorified through selfless love. On the days we're unhappy with the state of our marriage, we should find joy in remaining faithful because God is glorified through our covenantal commitment to the spouse of our "youth".

The first necessary question we should ask is, "What is submission"?

Paul called the church to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ Ephesians 5:21
This verse exposes the humility that ought to exist within the family of God. There is no position of prominence within the church. We are all members of Christ's body, of which He is the head. So, out of reverence for our king, Jesus, we are to submit to one another, meaning we are to yield ourselves to the good of one another.

Superiority and pride are the heart postures of the wicked. No one who has the love of Christ written on their heart is too good to submit. It doesn't matter if you are a 75-year-old pastor who has been walking with the Lord for 65 years or if you're a one-day-old convert; the life of a believer is one of humble service, not prideful dominance.

Paul turns to the context of marriage and directing his attention to the wife, saying that she is to "submit herself to her husband, as she does to the Lord." The word for submission is hypotassō. It means to put oneself under the authority and leadership of another willingly. This is a word used often throughout the New Testament. It's the same word used by Luke to describe Jesus as a child when he submitted to his parents (Lk. 2:51). It's the same word used in Ephesians 1 to explain how all things were put under the feet of Jesus (Eph. 1:22-23). It's the same word used in 1 Peter, where believers are called to be subject to every human institution (our governing authorities) for the Lord's sake (1 Pt. 2:13-14).

1 Peter 2, according to some scholars, offers a more pragmatic and utilitarian reason for submission. Peter instructs believers to submit "for the Lord’s sake" so that "by doing good you should silence the ignorance of foolish people" (1 Pet. 2:13, 15). His focus is less on the divine origin of the state and more on the believer's conduct as a witness.

What makes the call to submit so challenging to hear today is that submission appears to threaten one's identity and worth. The statement "submit to your husband" is often interpreted as "you are less than your husband" ...
Submission doesn't equate to a lack of dignity and worth. Submission shouldn't be offensive; it should be an honor.

In Genesis 1-2, we see that both men and women share the same human nature. They were both made in God's image and commissioned equally to rule the earth. Therefore, they are both equal in essence, deserving to be recognized, honored, valued, and dignified as human beings made in God's image. One is not "more human" or "more valuable" than the other. We also see in Genesis 2 that men and women received unique roles that should be expressed differently. Since Adam was created first and Eve was created to be Adam's helper (Gen. 2:18), God gave Adam specific instructions for him and Eve to abide by together (Gen. 2:16-17). Adam was responsible for leading, nourishing, and lovingly cherishing his wife. Eve was to complement and help Adam rule over creation. This indicates that, although a husband and a wife are equal, they've been given unique roles, they are one.

Equality is not the same thing as exactness. One of the many beauties of the Christian faith resides in our oneness and uniqueness. We are united yet different; we are one body but different members. In the same way, one of the beauties of marriage resides in the various roles God has called a husband and wife to.

As demonstrated in the Trinity: There is one God who eternally exists in three persons. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are equal in worth, value, and honor; they are one. But, despite this oneness, each person has a different role. In John 5, for example, we see Jesus tell the religious leaders that he was sent by the Father to do the work of the Father, walking in complete submission to the Father's will. So, although Jesus was one with the Father, he willingly submitted to the will of the Father. But, because the Son submitted to the Father, that doesn't mean he was any less than the Father. He was the Word made flesh, fully divine. Yet, He willfully, intentionally, and joyfully submitted himself to the Father's will.

If submission was offensive, Christ should be offended. But, if Christ willingly submits, we should willingly submit. Submission shouldn't be offensive; it should be an honor. Submission is an opportunity to display the life and character of our Savior and Lord, Jesus.
 
Submission is a great thing in marriage in particular. It leads to peace and order.
It's all about how we interpret "submission" and maybe in what context : )
 
Submission is a great thing in marriage in particular. It leads to peace and order.
It's all about how we interpret "submission" and maybe in what context : )

Hello everyone;

This is an excellent thread, Marriage: Ephesians 5:22-24 "Submission" or "Co-operation" or "Partnership"

I watch a secular show called Judge Judy that was on the air for 25 seasons. It exposed the moral and amoral behavior of our society. It's an unusual tool that I use to get understanding of the points of society behavior and what Jesus teaches in Scripture.

Submission is so overlooked in marital relationships, family, parents, children, siblings , friends and strangers.

Two areas and the results in my marriage that took much discipline where submission is applied.

15 years ago my wife and I would argue over the color curtains we wanted to put up in the living room or other rooms in our home. She would pick one color and I would pick the other.


Lesson I didn't trust her decision of what looked best in the house. Learned? I began to trust and respect her decisions. So when she picked the color we went with it. Five minutes later I'd forget about it. Obviously it didn't really matter to me the color but it was my distrust in her decision for the home.

Result We still make decisions together but when she decides on these kinds of things I trust her to go with it and we don't argue. I have enough on my plate outside of the home so when she makes the decisions inside the home it makes us feel more the partnership in our marriage.

Lesson If I come home and the laundry is still in the dryer or dinner is still being sauteed, I would wait for her to take care of it though she was at work, may be doing something else or taking a nap.

Result Now when household chores, dinner being prepared isn't being tended to, we/I will just take the bull by the horns and just get it done. This is also voluntary partnership and submission.

These are not perfect as hiccups will happen. There is no "cookie cutter" in each marriage but this is what works in ours.

What is
not submission is my wife condoning or joining me should I fall in sin. Submission in the area of priestly decisions, is when my wife's part is her way of trusting that I have prayed the Lord's guidance in all areas and taking responsibility instead of blaming. Regardless, she is with me through success and mistakes (emphasizing mistakes.)

God bless
everyone.

Bob










 
Hello everyone;

This is an excellent thread, Marriage: Ephesians 5:22-24 "Submission" or "Co-operation" or "Partnership"

I watch a secular show called Judge Judy that was on the air for 25 seasons. It exposed the moral and amoral behavior of our society. It's an unusual tool that I use to get understanding of the points of society behavior and what Jesus teaches in Scripture.

Submission is so overlooked in marital relationships, family, parents, children, siblings , friends and strangers.

Two areas and the results in my marriage that took much discipline where submission is applied.

15 years ago my wife and I would argue over the color curtains we wanted to put up in the living room or other rooms in our home. She would pick one color and I would pick the other.


Lesson I didn't trust her decision of what looked best in the house. Learned? I began to trust and respect her decisions. So when she picked the color we went with it. Five minutes later I'd forget about it. Obviously it didn't really matter to me the color but it was my distrust in her decision for the home.

Result We still make decisions together but when she decides on these kinds of things I trust her to go with it and we don't argue. I have enough on my plate outside of the home so when she makes the decisions inside the home it makes us feel more the partnership in our marriage.

Lesson If I come home and the laundry is still in the dryer or dinner is still being sauteed, I would wait for her to take care of it though she was at work, may be doing something else or taking a nap.

Result Now when household chores, dinner being prepared isn't being tended to, we/I will just take the bull by the horns and just get it done. This is also voluntary partnership and submission.

These are not perfect as hiccups will happen. There is no "cookie cutter" in each marriage but this is what works in ours.

What is
not submission is my wife condoning or joining me should I fall in sin. Submission in the area of priestly decisions, is when my wife's part is her way of trusting that I have prayed the Lord's guidance in all areas and taking responsibility instead of blaming. Regardless, she is with me through success and mistakes (emphasizing mistakes.)

God bless
everyone.

Bob
In our marriage, I have a lot of areas of life that I am trusted to make decisions in. Good leaders don't micromanage. In becoming submissive, I gained this trust from my husband.

A lot of power struggling is from a lack of trust. My husband now trusts that I respect him as the head of our home. So he feels safe to defer to me on various things like which house to live in or what's for dinner. If he feels strongly about something, he knows he is ultimately responsible for whether it works out or not.
 

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